Wednesday, May 15, 2019

It's There. Sometimes Hidden, Sometimes Not.

Hospital, Bed, Doctor, Surgery, HospitalI am running late today mostly because I spent a couple of days with no internet while traveling and finally got hooked up.  Normally, I would have done this ahead of time but my internet kind of crapped out so I couldn't.  Now for today's topic which is quite serious.

Yesterday was one of those weird days.  I woke up in the morning to a thick fog blanketing the day. It was so thick, I couldn't see more than about 10 feet ahead and that automatically means no travel.

It cleared up and I got out of town to Bethel and over to the big terminal and that is where I ran into IT!  As you know, I'm a teacher and I'm always running into current and former students.  In this case, I ran into a sweet young lady who'd started the year well but as the weeks passed her attendance dropped until she no longer came to school.  I asked others about here but no one seemed to know where she'd gone.

Her appearance shocked me and told me everything I needed to know without a word.  Both eyes were swollen, ringed with deep vibrant purple almost like a child applied eye shadow around the whole eye.  There were stitches in her scalp where a big gap of hair looked as if it been pulled out.  Her arm, wrapped and in a sling, appeared to have been broken.  All through this, she smiled.

I asked her about it and she told me her EX-boyfriend had done it.  Yes, the police had him in custody, away from her.  He would be charged and end up in jail.  I discovered, she'd gotten together with him after she came to school here.  Little by little he took over her life until she no longer came to school.  I didn't ask but it appeared he controlled her life to the point he'd even correct some of her actions.  Eventually, it lead to her being severely hurt.

I know at school, they've had regular session on what constitutes both good and bad relationships. They've showed videos but I also know students experience bad relationships because they don't see the relationships as bad, only as "He didn't mean it."  Years ago, I had a young lady who constantly broke down frequently, leaving the room in tears.  It came out later, she'd been sexually abused as a child by her brother but it stopped when she hit puberty.  Later on, he started again when she was in high school heading for graduation.  The worst thing, he was a police officer.  Yes, they arrested him and he went to jail.

In many places there is a culture of hiding abuse.  It happens and unless something happens to inform officials, it stays hidden and continues.  Even physical abuse like this is hidden because the person who did it was drunk and didn't know what they were doing so the mind set says that "It's ok".  The worst thing is even when these cases are reported, the system can't do anything about it because no one is willing to talk.

I am sorry she was physically hurt but at the same time, it got someone out of the village who could have done this to another girl.  She promised me she would go back to school and get her diploma but somewhere else away from his family because they would blame her for their son going to jail.

Sorry to be such a downer but it happens.  It happens in so many places with people protecting the perpetrators so its hidden.  Its a shame no one speaks about and the silence lets it continue.

Have a great day and let me know what you think, I'd love to hear.

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